Groundhog Day

Today is Groundhog Day.

Staten Island Chuck was hauled out of his burrow and predicted that spring is on the way. Nice!

Punxsutawney Phil, who lives much closer to here, saw his shadow. Six more weeks of winter. Shit.

As I was wondering which rodent oracle to believe, I found some groundhog-shaped cookies in a Cleveland coffee shop. Awesome, I thought. This ought to be good for some local divination. I'll get one and name it Cleveland Cookie! Maybe it means there will be an early spring.

I bought a cookie and headed out the door. Immediately afterward, I involuntarily skated down a giant ice patch that was the result of the melting and refreezing of January's 41 inches of snow. (This January was the second snowiest month ever in Cleveland records, which go back to 1870.) I went splat on the pavement. In the carnage, Cleveland Cookie was beheaded. So, uh, does that mean spring will never come? Eek.

On second thought

Fuck it. Squirrel picture.

Here's a squirrel dressed as Ohio's newest has-been, Joe the Plumber.




For more, including a creepy Squirrel Palin, look at Sugar Bush Squirrel. Don't say I never did nothin' for ya.

Help.

A letter to the editor in the Plain Dealer on Friday:

Is this Cleveland or Sodom?

Is Cleveland so hard up for money that we need to push aside our morals and integrity and vie to host the 2014 Gay Games (Plain Dealer, Oct. 16)? Are we condoning homosexuality by courting this event? It's bad enough that gay marriages are being legalized.

I'm sure that I am going to upset a lot of people, but I'm sorry. I'm no Bible thumper, but please tell me where in the Bible it says that men are to be with men and women are to be with women? If there is such a passage in the Bible, then I will gladly shut up.

-Juanita Solis, Cleveland


Interestingly enough, on the Plain Dealer website, the letter is called "Cleveland should let Gay Games go elsewhere."

On the upside, the Plain Dealer endorsed Obama.